When you join the kink community there are very few hard and fast rules that we are expected to conform with, however approaching the community and the people in it with consideration and common sense definitely goes a long way to helping make new friends.   A lot of us learn the hard way when it comes to certain aspects of the scene, and we look back thinking, ‘wow, I wish I’d known that sooner’, so we are attempting to cover some of the things we wish we’d been told before we got involved in the scene, and we also cover a few things we wish other people would learn, yes we mean the guy's still sending the dick pics! We’re not out to preach, and we have definitely made a few of these mistakes ourselves, and as always we don’t want to come across as negative, so while we are saying ‘don’t do this’ we are counteracting with what we think might be a better course of action to help make you more friends and make you experience on the scene even more awesome.   While we cover mostly ideas on improving your social interactions, we also throw in a few practical items and we also repeat some things we may have said once or twice before, but they are worth repeating. Dicks pics, consent, scene etiquette etc! I don’t think we can ever talk about these things enough.As always if you have any feedback on this episode, on the podcast in general or a kink related question, then please do email us on hello@proudtobekinky.com. You can also follow us on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook and Fetlife. We also love hearing from listeners on all these platforms, so if you’re following us do say a little hello and let us know you’re a listener.   You can also check out our sister podcasts from the Podcast Jukebox Network. This includes Off The Cuffs: a kink and BDSM podcast, Parking Lot Radio, the Will Sean Podcast and Drinks With God. You can also leave us all a lovely 5 star review if you're listening via iTunes (apple podcast app). You can also visit us on our Patreon page www.patreon.com/proudtobekinky. This is now the only place you will find new releases of our spin-off podcast FemDom and Fetish Fun, we have recorded a second episode and it should be with our Patron’s very soon.

Shibari is back! We know we may have mentioned it once or twice before, however we have got a wonderful guest in the lovely Sophia.Shibari who is an all round rope enthusiast. We have been long time followers of her Instagram account, and when we saw her perform a self suspension at the SlapStick Club (listen to episode 23 for more on that) we decided to reach out and see if she would like to come and chat with us, and to our delight she said yes. Sophia is not only a rope model, but also a rigger, she also teaches and facilitates rope jams at Anatomie Studio in London. Which if you ever get a chance to go to is well worth a visit. Anatomie Studio is a dedicated rope space, that not only offer tuition in rope, but also a wide range of other classes and opportunities. We do discuss this lots more within this episode. We talk to Sophia about what led her to joining the rope community, and as is often the case we end up discussing why we love it here at #ProudToBeKinky. We make a great case for how awesome the rope scene is and why anyone who is curious about rope should definitely give it a try. Floss marvels at how effortless Sophia makes self-suspension look and she tells us a little bit about her self-suspension performances, and how she finds the experience of tying herself. We also delve into how she got into the rigging side of rope, and how she developed the skills she has honed so beautifully. On the practical side of things we ask Sophia the following things:

• What is her advice for anyone wanting to get into Shibari?
• What conversations should people be having before they tie together?
• What are her favourites ties as a rope model?

As always you can reach us on hello [at] proudtobekinky.com if you have any comments on this episode, or any queries about the podcast or kink in general. Don’t forget you can also follow us on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook and Fetlife. We love hearing from people who are listening so please do reach out if you are a listener following us on any of these platforms. You can also check us out on Patreon, www.patreon.com/proudtobekinky. As if is an NSFW account you will need to follow the link to find us, we won’t show up in a Patreon search. Our new spin-off podcast ‘FemDom and Fetish Fun’ is going to be a Patron only reward as of episode 2, Floss is now sharing weekly Patron only posts and we are currently conspiring to come up with lots more awesome rewards. Don’t forget to check out our sister podcasts from the Podcast Jukebox Network, Off The Cuffs, Parking Lot Radio, the Will Sean Podcast and our new addition Drinks With God. You’re probably sick of me saying but if you're listening on iTunes (Apple Podcast App) please do leave a review, they make a huge difference to whether or not some people will be willing to take a punt on a new podcast. You can find Sophia on Instagram under sophia.shibari and you can find out more about Anatomie via their website anatomiestudio.com.

Polyamory and Ethical Non-Monogamy is this weeks focus, as Bakji and Floss are joined by the wonderful Page Turner from the website Poly.Land and also author of a new book Poly Land: My Brutally Honest Adventures in Polyamory. We stumbled across Page via Fetlife, when Floss came across her post Homing Pigeon Primary:Good Things Are Hard To Screw Up which was cross-posted from the Poly.Land blog. Since then Floss has been an avid reader of Poly.Land, and was very keen to give Page’s book a read once it was released. Polyamory is hard to miss as a lifestyle choice and subject matter when you join the kink scene, there is a fairly sizeable amount of kinky people who are either polyamorous, or have some kind of ethical non-monogamous activity within their relationships. With that in mind it has been important to cover polyamory at some point, finding the right people to discuss certain topics is important though, so we were delighted when Page said she would be happy to come and chat with us for an episode.   We cover some general things with Page like what inspired her to start her blog and how that progressed into her book. Also on a more personal level we discuss how she got into polyamory in the beginning and how she has navigated to the point she is at now.   Other topics we cover are some poly top-tips, and some useful resources, (other than Page’s own blog and book), which are recommended for people who are interested in exploring polyamory, or even just starting a conversation about potentially opening up. Some of the resources we mention are:  

• Polyamory Weekly - blog and podcast
• More Than Two - blog and book
• The Ethical Slut - book
• Poly In The News - blog
• Ferret Steinmetz - blog
• Daring Greatly - the book mentioned by Page that isn’t specifically about Poly

  We also touch upon the controversial question of can you learn to be poly or must it be our natural leanings, parting ways gracefully. the beauty of compersion and meeting Stephen King. Bakji also tries to make quick fire questions poly related, which doesn’t really work, but we try and roll with it anyway.   Our email is hello@proudtobekinky.com, and you are welcome to use that for podcast comments or questions, or even just general kink related questions if you think we can be of assistance. You can also follow us on Instagram, Twitter, Fetlife and Facebook.   If you have listened to all of the #ProudToBeKinky episodes and are looking for new podcasts to check out, then please tune in to some of the other podcasts in the Podcast Jukebox Network; Off the Cuffs, Parking Lot Radio, the Will Sean Podcast and Drinks With God. We all appreciate lovely reviews being left for us too if you listen on iTunes.

Kinky paraphernalia is the topic of this week’s episode. As Bakji and Floss go it alone without a guest, to discuss all their favourite and most used items for their BDSM shenanigans.

 

Before I go on though, make sure you listen until the very end of the episode because we make a new and exciting announcement, which you will not want to miss.

 

Onto the content of the episode. We cover money savings tips and how to find good deals and discounts. Floss pimps Lovehoney so much that it’s probably impossible to convince you that she doesn’t work them, unfortunately we do not get any commission from you guys going their. Just the satisfaction of knowing you got a great deal and some sexy fun.

 

However, if you’re on a budget, or just fancy being creative, we also tackle ‘Make Your Own’ and ‘Vanilla Repurposing’. We had to take to Whatsapp to pick our friends brains for this one, because a) neither of us are that crafty and b) we use all our imagination on this podcast. So big shout out to our lovely friends for their awesome ideas.

 

It’s fair to say most people love a bargain, and not many of us want to pay more than is necessary for a product. Which is why we at #ProudToBeKinky are big fans of ‘Cheap but Good’, things we bought for a great price but do a great job, and even in some cases outshine their more expensive counterpart. Unfortunately the flip side to that is ‘Cheap but Shite’, classy name we know, but we go down that road too. Positivity is our main aim though, so we also let you know what is expensive and worth every penny. Hint, it’s Latex.

 

Some companies we give shoutouts too, and always recommend are:

 

• For sexy toys, lubes, lingerie & bondage - https://www.lovehoney.co.uk/
• For Latex - https://www.westwardbound.com/
• For Latex - https://libidex.com/
• For Rope - https://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/MMHJute?ref=search_shop_redirect

 

If we didn’t cover something in this episode, but you are curious where you can buy something, or wonder if we have any recommendations then please do send us a message and we can do what we can to assist you. Our email as ever is hello@proudtobekinky.com, and we love getting your emails so do not hesitate if you are thinking of writing in. If email isn't your thing, but you do want to get a bit involved with the podcast you can follow us on Instagram, Twitter, Fetlife and Facebook.

 

Big shoutout as ever to our sister podcasts within the Podcast Jukebox Network. Off The Cuffs, the Will Sean Podcast and Parking Lot Radio. All worth a listen and all available on most podcast apps, and don’t forget if you listen to any of us on iTunes (Apple Podcast App) please do leave a review, they make all the difference in letting new listeners know whether or not to take a chance on listening to an as yet unheard podcast.

Cross-dresser. Transvestite. Gender-Fluid. Transgender. BiGender. Just a few of the words that come up in this episode. They may not mean to you what they mean to our guest, and every approach is valid when someone identifies with any or all of those words. The words we have at our disposal to describe ourselves can be key in our acceptance of who we are. Being able to successfully put across  to others, where we fall on the spectrum of gender can sometimes also be key to their understanding of who we are. Allowing for more open and beneficial conversations.

[caption id="attachment_1377" align="aligncenter" width="300"] Crossdressing and Being Gender Fluid[/caption]  

Our guest for this episode presents as both male and female. George when presenting as male, and Georgie when presenting as female. When we met it was a day for she and her pronouns, despite Bakji’s accidental faux pas of ‘we are joined with a chap named George’ right at the beginning of our interview. Luckily we were talking to a very open, lovely and level-headed individual who understands these things happen. If you would like to follow George on Twitter you can do so via @georgemitton.

Part of why we were keen to invite George onto the podcast is that he is completely open with everyone in his life about his Gender-Fluid orientation. Including family, friends and colleagues. With many aspects of BDSM and alternative lifestyles of all types the decision about whether or not to be open is a really big one. So speaking to someone who has been through it was an interesting experience.

We asked Georgie how and when she discover this side of herself, and how it integrated into her life in both the earlier days, and up to and including the present day. This includes some success stories of sharing with others, and periods of time where George was pushed to the forefront, and the fluidity of gender was not as present.

Overall though this is an immensely positive episode, we discuss how we can best approach telling people about the aspect of yourself you have yet to share with them, in this case being Gender-Fluid, but it could equally apply to other situations. We also cover women (and of course men) who not only support men who identify in these ways, but are also actively attracted to them.

Make-up, clothes, prosthetic boobs and wigs also come up in conversation, as we ask Georgie where some good places to shop are, and what key pieces she finds most useful. Likewise we enquire as to what kind of events are available, for once you are all dressed up and want to get together with some like minded folk. Obviously as always you can hit Fetlife and the usual Fetish events and munches that we recommend, but we actually do discover some new events through talking to Georgie. 

If any of what we talk about in this episode resonates with you, but you still have questions or any comments then please do get in touch. You can email us via hello@proudtobekinky.com. You can also get in touch through any one of our social media accounts, we are on Instagram, Twitter, Fetlife and Facebook. All messages are welcome. 

We are also proud to be part of the Podcast Jukebox Network. If you haven’t already please check out, Off The Cuffs: a kink and BDSM podcast, Parking Lot Radio and the Will Sean Podcast. If you listen to any of us on iTunes/Apple podcast app, please do leave us a review, they really are invaluable for helping other find the podcasts you enjoy.

You can also support us on Patreon, any support will go towards growing the podcast so we can reach more people, speak to more guests and generally make #ProudToBeKinky the best damn podcast it can be.