The Queen of Fetish Cabaret, Marnie Scarlet joins us for this episode and we couldn’t be more excited to chat with her. We have had the pleasure of seeing a couple of Marnie’s performances and they do not disappoint. Please do check them out. Links will be provided at the end of this post.
Latex is possibly one of the first things we noticed about Marnie, because as we may have mentioned once or twice we have both got the hots for the lovely shiny rubbery stuff. Which means we obviously asked Marnie all about making her outfits. If you haven’t seen her outfits yet, once you do you will be utterly amazed by her creations. They are gorgeous, fun, inventive and beautifully crafted.
There is a huge variety of themes across all Marnie’s acts, so we discuss where she gets her inspiration from and how her ideas go from that to a full performance piece. We also go right back to the beginning and find out how Marnie came to start performing, both within the kink scene and out of it. The type of events and countries she often travels to come up as well, so if you’re an international listener and think you might miss out on seeing Marnie live, you may be in luck, one day she might be performing at an event near you.
Marnie was recently featured in some mainstream newspapers in her outfit for London Pride. I cannot blame them for this, it was a brilliant outfit. #prideoutfitgoals for sure. With this is mind, and in light of the fact Marnie also takes her performances in non-fetish settings, we ask about the reception she receives from the non-kinky folk.
As well as checking out Marnie on social media, which once again I will recommend you definitely do, you can also come and find us on social media if you haven’t already. We are on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook and Fetlife. You are welcome to connect with us across all those platforms and you can also email us on hello@proudtobekinky.
We are also part of the Podcast Jukebox Network, so please do pop along to our sister podcasts Off The Cuffs: a kink and BDSM podcast, the Will Sean Podcast, Drinks with God and Parking Lot Radio. If you like any of those guys please do leave them a little review and of course us too if you haven’t done so already.
Anatomie Studios are the focus of this week's episode as we talk to Anna Bones, who opened and runs Anatomie, the U.K’s only full time rope studio. Open since June 2015, Anatomie has gone from strength to strength and provides a safe and welcoming environment for people to learn and practice their Shibari skills.
We ask Anna how she started her own journey into discovering Shibari, and how that led to the opening of Anatomie. We have spoken about Anatomie before in previous episodes but it was wonderful to hear about it in Anna’s own words, from initial vision to eventual reality.
There are a variety of sessions available at Anatomie, some are geared towards learning, some towards practice and some are neither of the two. I will let you listen in to hear Anna discuss the various things you can discover at Anatomie.
We discuss the value in joining your local rope community, and what you can gain from learning from both people like Anna and her partner Fred Hatt who offer tuition at Anatomie and also from peers. There are also a myriad of wonderful Riggers out there who offer rope tutorial workshops, many of which can be found at Anatomie.
Nearly everyone has some preconceptions about rope before they try it, we talk through what some of these are and the pleasant surprises you get once you actually join the rope community. Some of these include the tactile and wonderful nature of the rope itself, and also the reasons behind why many of us do rope.
Anatomie Studio have been accepted into the Peckham Festival, happening 14th - 17th September 2017, which gives us a chance to discuss how Anna and Fred are received when they take Shibari into the world of non-kinky folk. They have also done rope for music videos and art projects.
There is so much more in our discussion with Anna, and so much to discover at Anatomie Studio if you are able to visit. If however you’re not able to visit Anatomie please do get in touch with you local rope community if you are keen to get into Shibari and meet friend who are also rope fans.
You can find Anatomie Studio in the following places:
If you would like to find us on social media you can do so via Instagram, Twitter, Fetlife and Facebook. You can also follow the link on Fetlife to our personal profiles and add us there too should you wish to. As always you are also welcome to email us too on email@example.com and if you go to flossdoeslife.com you can get in touch with us via the contact page, even if it is about the podcast and not the blog.
We are also still after your reviews, so if you are listening on Apple Podcasts please do leave us a star rating and a review, preferably a lovely one, if you think we’ve earned it of course. You can also do the same for our fellow Podcast Jukebox Network shows should you be enjoying them too. They are Off the Cuffs, Parking Lot Radio, Drinks with God and the Will Sean Podcast.
Twisted Lingerie was mentioned by TheWickedJade back in episode 28. Which brought them to our attention, we then started following them on Instagram and Twitter because quite honestly it all looked super sexy and I have my eye on it for future purchases.
What actually transpired though was some mutual exchanges on Twitter, and I started to get a really good vibe from the Twisted brand and decided that they would make a great podcast guest. Thankfully Sophie who founded and owns the twisted lingerie brand decided that she would like to give this podcasting malarkey a go and here we are.
Twisted Lingerie is a fetish inspired brand, which can be seen throughout their collections. It’s provocative and seductive, but also affordable. We ask Sophie what inspired her to start Twisted, and how it moved from a thought to an active business.
One of the things that prompted me to invite Sophie onto the podcast was the community spirit of the Twisted Lingerie Twitter feed. Not only is it body positive, it’s also kink positive, two things we feel really passionate about. There are lots of tweets supporting and encouraging people and that is something we are keen to advocate.
We ask Sophie about her recent appearance at the Diamonds and Deals Conference for women in business where she gave a talk. Which leads us onto talking about supporting women in business, sexual empowerment and how sometimes women can feel the need to be apologetic for things they want out of life, and that actually we all feel that should not be the case.
Body positivity and body shaming get an airing again, because let’s be honest we probably can’t talk about these things enough, not just as a podcast but as a community. We discuss how things like lingerie, and shibari can sometimes pave the way to us feeling a little bit more love for our bodies and how important that is.
I shall let you discover the rest of the show for yourself, but if you have any comments on this episode or previous episodes please do get in touch via firstname.lastname@example.org. You can also send us any general kink questions, or suggestions for episodes or guests you might like us to cover. You can also follow us on Instagram, Twitter, Fetlife and Facebook. If Patreon is your thing you can also visit us there too https://www.patreon.com/proudtobekinky where you will find our spin-off podcast FemDom and Fetish Fun.
We are also part of the Podcast Jukebox Network with Off the Cuffs, Drinks with God, Parking Lot Radio and the Will Sean Podcast. Please do give them a listen and leave us all lovely reviews if you think we have earned them. Which we definitely have. We’re all awesome.
Links from the show:
Communication is our topic this week, as Bakji and I (Floss) go it alone to share their thoughts on the importance of communicating with your partner. Our private conversations over the last few weeks have come back round to communication on many occasions. Both reflecting on how communicating with previous partners has been more difficult than we felt it should be, and why we thought that might be.
We discuss why communication is so important especially within the kink community, be that with a casual play partner or within an established dynamic. Whether you are wanting to talk about sexual desires, kinky desires or your relationship as a whole, we cover how there is often a time and place for these discussions and how sensitivity and empathy is a must.
Face to face, over the phone, Whatsapp, Trello and Instagram are all methods of communicating Bakji and I have used in our time together. I always feel that as adults we are meant to be totally down with face to face communication, but I’m here to say, sod that. Sort of. I think if something is making you feel anxious when it comes to discussing it, and you can find a more comfortable way to express yourself that will move things forward, then why not do it.
That said myself and Bakji have both become a lot better at actually using our words and communicating with each other both the good, the not so good, and of the course the kinky, sexy awesomeness. We discuss how this has helped our relationship, and what we think made communicating with each other different to previous relationships.
We reflect on how our experiences of talking about sex and physical desires in our younger years are very different. We wonder if this is a gender divide, or a throwback to when women were actively discouraged from embracing and enjoying their sexuality and having their sexual needs and want wasn’t seen as the done thing.
The Top/bottom dynamic also extends outside of kink dynamics and into non-kink sexual interactions, we do feel though that isn’t explored outside of the kink community and therefore it can sometimes be hard to express your needs without those terms at your disposal to help explain the nuances of what it is you're looking for.
Things get mildly controversial as we discuss the importance of sexual attraction and desire in life, and how romantic love sometimes gets prioritised when it isn’t necessarily the most important thing for everyone. We talk about how knowing what is important to you is what matters most and being able to express that without feeling guilty is essential.
If you have any thoughts yourself on this week's episode, or any others please do get in touch with us. You can contact us via hello@proudtobekinky, or you can hit social media and find us on Instagram, Twitter, Fetlife and Facebook. We have had some truly wonderful messages recently and they have made us smile from ear to ear, and one may have brought a tear to my eye.
When you’ve caught up on all the episodes of #ProudToBeKinky and you’re looking for somethign else to listen to check out our friends in the Podcast Jukebox Network. Off the Cuffs, Drinks with God, Parking Lot Radio and the Will Sean podcast. They are all fabulous for different reasons, but well worth a listen.
Kayla Lords and John Brownstone, hosts of the Loving BDSM Podcast, are our guests this week. Not only do they host a podcast, but they each have their own blog, and Loving BDSM has it’s own site with a great community feel to it, helped by the forum and other additions such as their monthly book club.
We discuss how Kayla and John met and how their dynamic works for them, with Kayla identifying as a Babygirl and John being a Daddy Dom. They also identify as having a 24/7 dynamic, but how they manage and maintain that may not be the same as how other people do. We are big fans of sharing experiences and inviting other people to take from that what is useful to them, and Kayla and John do a wonderful job of sharing their thoughts in an open, honest and inviting manner.
Reading someone’s blog can be a great insight into who they are and what they are interested in. As their blogs played a key part in how they got together, it leads us to talk about both John and Bakji did their research before wooing their respective partners. Lots of friendships have been built through blogs and social media too, and we ponder how we are meant to make friends with someone who isn’t baring their soul on the internet on a daily basis. When you are a proud and self confessed social media whore.
Evolution of kinks and kink identities is a huge part of being a kinky person. Almost everyone within the kink community has a got a story of how they have changed since joining the scene. This usually means more fun and a better understanding of both ourselves and kink as a whole. Kayla and John share how their relationship has evolved, their online presence has evolved and also how their kinks have evolved, both individually and as a couple.
Part of what makes Loving BDSM a must listen podcast is the fact John and Kayla allow fun and silliness not only into their lives but also into their D/s. While there is a lot of serious conversations that need to be had when you are engaging in BDSM, it is also meant to be fun. This comes up in the podcast through the various points raised, including what our various approaches to aftercare look like, and it isn’t necessarily how you’d imagine it look, especially if you are new to kink.
There is so much more that we cover in this episode, but I think I shall let you discover the rest for yourself, or the blog post will be a mammoth essay rather than a little round-up. You can find all the links to Loving BDSM below, as well as links to other resources mentioned within this episode.
As well as Loving BDSM, you can also listen to the other fab podcast that our part of our little Podcast Jukebox Network. Off the Cuffs: a kink and BDSM podcast, the Will Sean Podcast, Drinks with God and Parking Lot Radio. We are all on iTunes and we will love you forever if you leave us a star rating and review.
You can also wing by our Patreon site and see what is going on their for our Patrons. The most exciting of which is access to our spin-off podcast FemDom and Fetish fun, to check that out use this link https://www.patreon.com/proudtobekinky. You can also follow us on Instagram, Twitter, Fetlife and Facebook, just use the seqarch term ‘proudtobekinky’.